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20 Ways You Can Help Prevent Child Abuse

From the Texas Department of Family and Protective ServicesWhat You Can DoUnrealistic expectations of parenthood, differences between what we want and what we actually have, a strained relationship with our marriage partner, too much to do and too little time, financial problems, drug abuse, alcoholism, and a history of being abused as a child are examples of problems that can cause parents to take out anger and frustration on their children. Even very loving parents can lose control to the point of child abuse. Here are some actions you can take to help children and their parents.

  1. Be a good example.

    Respect your family members. Use a courteous tone of voice with them. When children misbehave, let them know that you dislike what they did, not who they are. Don’t hit your kids; violence teaches violence. Apologize when you’re wrong. Say “I love you” more often. Reward good behavior. 

  2. Be a friend to a parent.
    Listen. Sometimes, just being able to express anger and frustration helps ease tensions. Go shopping with a parent and child. Children are usually better behaved when their adults are happier and more relaxed. Invite a parent to go jogging or bowling or golfing. Exercise helps relieve stress. 
  3. Reach out to neighbors or relatives with children.
    Offer to babysit to give them a much-needed break.
  4. Praise and encourage the children you know.
    Mean words can make a child feel worthless, ugly, and unloved, and the hurt can last a lifetime. So be positive. Tell a child you’re proud of her and why. Stick up for her; don’t let others tease or make fun of her. Smile. Let her know she is important to you. Say, “You’re terrific. I like you!”
  5. Take action…don’t wait for someone else to do it!
    Arrange for a speaker on child abuse and neglect to come to your PTA, church, club, or workplace. The more we all know about abuse and neglect, the more we can do to stop it.
  6. Organize safety systems for your neighborhood.
    Arrange for neighbors who are at home most of the day to watch out for children on their way to and from school. Set up “safe houses” where children can go if they feel threatened or afraid. Participate in a telephone network for neighborhood children who are home alone after school and need help, advice, or reassurance.
  7. Volunteer.
    Volunteer your time in a child crisis shelter, parenting support program, drug abuse prevention or treatment program, or shelter for the homeless.
  8. Set up an after-school-hours program at a retirement home.
    It’s hard to tell who benefits more from such an arrangement, the children or the elders. 
  9. Form a Carpenters Guild.
    Work with others in your church, club, or workplace to repair homes of disadvantaged families to make them more livable for children. 
  10. Host a baby shower.
    Invite friends and neighbors to bring items for needy infants and children. 
  11. Start a resource room.
    Call your local office of the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services and collect diapers, clothing, toys, books, and formula to help ease the transition for children who must be removed from their homes because of abuse and neglect. Hold a fund raiser to buy school supplies for foster children.
  12. Work in a day-care center.
    Volunteer your time in a day-care center that serves abused and neglected children. Work with your church, club, or organization to form a partnership with a child-care center that serves low-income children.
  13. Be a mentor. 
    Help a pregnant teen-ager learn parenting skills. Or be a mentor to a pre-teen through one of the school mentoring programs. 
  14. Learn more about child abuse and child abuse prevention. 
    Teach others. Plan an adult education program in your church, club, or organization to inform people about children’s needs. Open your group’s facility to local education programs for parents. 
  15. Become a foster parent.
    It’s not an easy job, but the rewards are great when you help a child learn what it feels like to be safe. 
  16. Help a foster child get a good start.
    Call the Preparation for Adult Living program in the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services and provide “housewarming gifts” of linens, pots and pans, small appliances, and lamps for 18-year-old foster children who are moving out on their own. 
  17. Get involved with the child welfare board in your county.
  18. Understand which children are most likely to be abused.
    Although child abuse occurs in all racial, ethnic, cultural, and socio-economic groups, physical abuse and neglect are more likely among people living in poverty. Children who are most likely to be abused are children who are mentally retarded, premature, unwanted, stubborn, inquisitive, demanding, or have a disability 
  19. Learn to recognize the signs of abuse. 
    Know the signs of neglect, physical abuse, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse listed at the bottom of this page. Know them. 
  20. Report suspected child abuse and neglect.
    Call 1-800-252-5400 or your local law enforcement agency if you think a child is being neglected, sexually abused, or physically or emotionally abused. Children are hardly ever abused only once. If you suspect it, you must report it. That’s the law. Reporting suspected child abuse makes it possible for a family to get help. Note: Other states may use (512) 834-3784 to report abuse or neglect that has occurred in Texas.

 

Top Ten Parenting Tips for Today Parents

Top Ten Parenting TipsWe agree that parenting a child is a huge task – surviving nine months of pregnancy, then the pain of labor, and later chasing your child through the crawling, feeding, toilet training stages – it’s a lengthy experience indeed. But all this pain and agony disappears and a coat of excitement grips you when you first hear your baby calling you ‘Mamma-Dada’ or when your baby takes his very first step.
 
Though parenting a newborn requires a large amount of effort and energy, the positive aspect of the reward you receive by watching your baby grow and develop is priceless. Today, we help each and every new parent by presenting a few tips ranging from child potty training to baby care, so that parenting becomes an (ever so slightly) easier task for you. 
 
Potty can even take hours
 
Don’t get into high hopes when you take your child to eliminate the waste. Some kids may surprise you by doing this mechanism in minutes. Don’t expect your child to do the same; your child can even take hours to eliminate his waste. Let him take his own time, and keep cool.
Elastic waists are your baby’s friends
 
Make your child’s dressing and undressing process simple and effortless. Many kids are uncomfortable with buttons and zippers, because it can be a time consuming affair and can make your baby frustrated when he wants to visit the bathroom. Hence, invest in elastic waist pants or shorts, until your child is comfortable with the buttons and swaps.
 
Don’t go overboard with technology
 
You may be geeky when it comes to new technologies, but it can scare your child quite a bit. When you take your child to the bathroom, and there is an automated flusher installed, the loud noise may petrify your child. The fear can grip so deeply that he may never use the bathroom alone.
 
More time with your child and less work
 
If you want to get the required attention from your child then you too must dedicate time for your child. Focus on the things that make your baby happy. When you are with your baby, avoid multi-tasking as this can spoil your relationship with your baby.
 
You might have to change a whole lot of bed sheets…
 
Some kids take much longer to master the technique of staying dry overnight. In case your child wakes up wet, then don’t yell at him, it is completely normal. The reason for him to wake up wet could be that he is in deep sleep. Just keep an extra set of bed sheet to let him sleep peacefully.
 
You will make new friends
 
You might have an endless list of good pals, but those friends may just end up being a peripheral group now. You don’t choose your friends now, your child chooses friends for you. Nowadays, you will end up hanging with moms and dads of those children that your child met at the playground or playmates from school.
 
Your living room will be messy
 
Slowly when your baby grows up, you will jump with joy to see your baby rolling, crawling and then finally walking. But that peace of moment can turn into a nightmare when your baby becomes mobile.
 
You will see your living room turn into a huge mess, when your child will suddenly turn into a mischievous monster. Suddenly you will see your closet empty and all the clothes on the floor, and whatever is within his reach will find its way to the floor and odd corners of the room.
 
Keep calm, and don’t forget to keep hazardous objects beyond your baby’s reach.
 
Your maternity leave will be tougher than the toughest work days
 
You may plan your maternity leave by doing all last minute tasks at work and then feel like your vacation has just started on the last day before maternity leave begins. But you’re in for a surprise. Your maternity leave is an incredible time to bond with your baby but it can be a little gruesome as well.
 
When you are with your baby, everything turns out to be sweet
 
There can be incredible sweet moments with your baby, even if you’ve just yelled at him. These moments are very special for each and every parent, who wishes to keep those memories alive forever. After a serious fight with your baby, your baby can make your day just by coming close to you, kissing your nose and gently whispering to you, ‘I Love You’. And Finally…
It is very important to be consistent because even up to the age of 12 years, children still would not understand those things that are exceptional to the rule and if you are not consistent, they will think that you are a liar.

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1. Seven Things Kids Never Tell Parents

Most parents believe that their children tell them everything. But that’s far from the truth. In fact, there are certain things you should never tell your parents. Here are some of them…
That you sometimes splurge
Your idea of cheap may not be shared by your folks. At the same time, there are things that you just can’t resist. So, what do you do? Well, if you are financially independent, don’t tell your parents how much you spent on shopping.
You hate the clothes they bought for you
Your fashion sensibilities may not match, but be diplomatic when your parents gift you something that seems to be straight out of an 80s’ movie. Ask for the bill and exchange it discreetly. When they ask you about the dress, tell them that you loved it and have kept it aside for special occasions.
You party when they are away
Most children love it when their parents are away for a few days — that’s their chance to enjoy newfound freedom. But it is better — for them and you — if they don’t know that you have been waiting for them to leave.
You drink more often than they think you do
Most parents like to believe that their children will never overstep the line, especially when it comes to smoking and alcohol. But the fact remains that whenever they get an opportunity, the younger lot make the most of it. If you are high on alcohol, don’t announce it at home.
You are a good kisser
It’s great if you can talk to your parents about sex, but there’s no need to burden them with unwanted information. Keep your dates a secret if you want your parents to let you out of the house after sunset.
That you blew ` 1,000 on coffee
In a situation like this, most mothers would say, “Why can’t you have coffee at home instead of a coffee shop?” But there are times when you just have to visit that coffee shop. Your parents will freak out if they know that they could have done their grocery-shopping with the money you spent on coffee and some sandwiches.
That you have at times ‘borrowed’ from their purse
You were short on cash and decided to borrow some from your folks, and forgot to mention it to them? Well, that’s not on. Even if you don’t tell your parents, promise yourself that you will never do it again.

2. How To Handle Angry Teenagers

When your kids are growing, it’s very normal to find them getting angry. You may be the main cause of their quick anger. Their anger may also be caused by their lack of maturity since they are just teenagers. But at times they may be having the right reasons of getting angry.
 
As a parent, you should be able to have ways of handling your teenager when he or she is angry. Otherwise if you fail to handle them properly it may lead to havoc in your family.
 
There are various issues you should consider when handling angry teens. This includes but not limited to:
 
  • Show your angry teenager how much you love him or her. Whenever your teen is angry, try to show him how much he or she means to you. Be the nicest parent at that moment .Soothe him down and he will realize that you care. Even if it means to buy your teen a present of what he likes most go ahead it will be worth. Ask your teenager calmly if you have wronged him or her. It can also be another person who might have done something wrong to your teenager. If someone has made him mad ensure you assure your teenager that you will strictly warn that person not to do something wrong to your teenager again.
  • Communicate often with your angry teenager. Communication always makes a strong bond between people who are related to each other. Talk to your teenager whenever he is angry and even when calm. Let him tell you what makes him or her angry so that you will avoid getting him or her mad. Avoid arguments with your teenager since it will make him or her angrier. Your teenager will thus be feeling free with you. You should understand that teenagers are more prone to getting angry.
  • As a parent, you should have lots of respect for yourself and also for your teenager. If you involve yourself in ugly incidents in front of your teenage then he will take after you. Don’t blame your teenager for such a case. Many teenagers take their nature from how they see their parents relate or other grownups. Whenever your teenager is angry and you tell him he is being childish this will worsen the situation. Tell your teenager how big he has grown and should calm down. If you will show your angry teenager respect, you will also get respected in turn and your angry teenager will tend to understand you more. He or she will also listen to you and you will be in a better position to handle his or her anger.
  • You should be slow to anger. When your teen is angry, to handle him will require you to take it easy. Do not shout at your angry teen. He will get angrier because what your teen will require is peace but not more havoc. So you should talk to your teenager on a low tone. Approach him slowly and calmly. Don’t beat him up. Many parents make this mistake. Inflicting pain to your teenager will never be a solution. Make sure your teenager does not fear you. When handling angry teens, there should be total closeness with you and your teenager.
  • Always be concerned about your teenager. Many parents do not have time for their children. Listen to the teenager’s side of view. Where your angry teenager is wrong, correct him in a mature way. Make him realize that you are concerned with his or her well being. When a teacher invites you to school over your teenager’s conduct in school, go and be cautious not to stress him or her by creating more anger. Whenever your teenager needs you be there. In case it’s impossible do not ignore him or her. You can leave a message indicating that you will not make it. State the reasons as to why you will not attend to your teenager at that time. Make sure that you will indicate you will make up for the moment.
Handling angry teenagers requires lots of sacrifice. If you really want to bring up your teenager in the best way possible then you will have to make all the necessary sacrifices as indicated above. If you will follow all that, then you will find it easy in handling angry teenagers. And when all goes well then you will have achieved a lot in handling angry teens. They are your teens and you want them to have the best. So be the first to give your teens the best!

3. Tips To Deal With Child Behavior Problem

Some parents consider physical punishment as the most appropriate style for behavior correction. But it cannot teach him the discipline lesson and how to stay calm in worst situation. 
 
Here are some behavior correction tips for the parents that are very effective and give good results.
  • Stop overprotecting your baby and try to solve out the issue as soon as it could be done. Don’t forget to appreciate your baby when he shows good behavior.
  • Your child deserves your love and affection. Whenever he feels sad or alone you should touch your baby affectionately.
  • Every child has its own individual identity. Some babies are shy, other are confident. But you cannot force your baby for changing his basic nature. Parents should always accept and appreciate their kids as they are.
  • You should not force your baby for performing some activity until he is not ready for starting some act by himself.
  • If your baby is good in completing any task then don’t forget to offer some incentives. Incentives encourage him for performing equally good in the future.
  • If your baby is rude then try to know the reason for his rude behavior. Some parents start punishing their kids without knowing the main reason for his rude behavior. Punishment can make him rude more instead of solving out the issue. You should be calm and handle the situation wisely.
  • Make a list of routine tasks and also assign some reward and punishment for each task. Now your baby becomes more responsible in completing his task as he knows he is going to get some reward for it.
  • You should never criticize your toddler in front of others for his bad behavior. Your reaction can impact your child in a negative style.
  • If your child is showing bad behavior then never declare your kid as a bad child. You should teach him how to correct his behavior for becoming better.
  • You should ask your baby for taking some decision. Also make him realize that he is equally important in your family. When you are going for shopping don’t forget to ask your child his likes and dislikes.
  • Sometimes it becomes necessary to behave like friends instead of parents. Spend some healthy time with your baby daily and share your experience with your child. Also ask him to explain his daily routine in front of you. In this way, you are able to establish good bonding with your child.
  • Also make your child familiar with rituals and family routines. This is a good habit to adjust according to family trend.
  • Whenever you prepare a rule list for your baby, ask him for some good changes or modifications. If he does not agree at some point then don’t argue with him and make slight modifications for his satisfaction.
  • You should teach your baby how to calm down and how to manage the anger in difficult situations.
  • If your child is aggressive then you don’t have to tolerate his aggressive behavior. Make him clear that aggressive behavior will not be acceptable at any cost.

4.How To Stop Child’s Lying Habits

Children tend to start lying at a very young age. This is because they have an active imagination and often get lost in their own fantasies. This apart, they do not have a clear perception of right from wrong as yet.We as parents tend to ignore fanciful tales sprung by a child, but suddenly as the child grows up a little and lies about something more important, we get distraught. Why is our child lying to us, we wonder, and what do we do to stop this so it doesn’t become a habit?

Don’t overlook small lies 

We often tend to forgive and overlook little lies, even smirk at them if they seem silly or funny. Don’t do this. The next time you catch your child saying something untrue, check him there and then. Now, he may be lying about how his teacher caught a boy by the collar and hung him upside-down from the fan, but before long he will be lying about whether he studied at home when you were out, or whether he simply played the fool.

Punish him 

After checking your child for lying, punish him by sending him to his room or taking away his favourite toy.

Speak to your child 

Once your child realizes that it is wrong to lie, sit down and have a conversation with him. Teach him about the importance of saying the truth. It is surprising how many parents never really sit down with their children and tell them to be truthful. Your child should also be told that he may even be punished after speaking the 
truth, but that you will always be proud that your child spoke the truth and accepted his punishment instead of escaping punishment with a lie.

Reward truthful behaviour 

Help your child practice honesty by questioning him on matters even though you already know the answers. Initially ask him only those questions where the truth will not get him into trouble. By doing so you will be building his character. Reward him when he speaks the truth.

Praise positive behaviour 

The next time your child tells you the truth even though he knows by doing so he will be getting into trouble, do not shout at him as much. Take away a privilege like ground him for the evening but also make sure you praise him and tell you how proud you are of him. It also makes sense to praise your child to your friends when your child is within earshot. Tell your friend how proud you are that your child never lies to you, even if he knows he will be punished. Such praise will have a profound impact on your child, and he will be even more determined not to let you down.

Practice what you preach 

You cannot expect your children to be honest if they sense that you are dishonest in some manner. You have to teach your children by example. So the next time you break something at home, instead of just throwing it in the bin, make sure everyone knows you have broken it, and that you are owning up. Remember, children learn what they see and life.

 

5. Tips to Raise an Honest and Truthful Child

Every parent wants to raise a child who is honest, truthful and a good citizen. Raising an honest and responsible child cannot be an instant process. It is an ongoing parenting process which should take place right from the birth of child. Read on to find the tips for raising an honest and truthful child.Children are honest till they know the difference between true and false. Also the child feels that he needs to speak things that appeal his parents whether or not it istrue. Yes, this is the fact. When children are unable to communicate their truest feelings, they start lying.

 
Most of the adults who lie are those who were brought up in an environment where they had to meet the standards set by their parents and not remain true to themselves. Majority of parents wish to bring up an honest child but find it very difficult to teach honesty to their children. Here are some tips that might help you teach and fill truthfulness in your children.
 
Tips to Raise an Honest and Truthful Child
 
Be a Role Model
 
Children learn everything from the surroundings. Their parents are ideal for them and they prefer following them. So, you have to be honest first and then expect honesty from your child.You have to show the courage to speak the truth. Remember, you are the model for your child. You need to speak truth to yourself. Modeling truthfulness and honesty is the best way to teach these values to children.
 
Let your Child Express his Feelings
 
Every parent takes decisions and foresees their children’s future. Do not forget that he is a human being with feelings and dreams. If your child expresses his feelings in a different way and wants to be like someone else, respect who your child is. If this does not happen, he might hide his feelings so that he does not get disapproved.
 

Always Listen to Your Child

 
Sometimes it is difficult for you to understand and difficult for your child to speak the truth as well. Make him comfortable and assure him. If we listen and understand their truth, we are giving ways for him to be honest in future.
 
Encourage Your Child’s Passion
 
When you find out about the passion of your child, do encourage him about that. Even if your child shows consciousness about environment and pollution, appreciate his intention and if possible give him the right guidance as well. For example if he feels and thinks like an animal saviour or talks about citizen’s rights or likewise,encourage him for that. You never know your child can be the future leader and bring fruitful changes in the society.
 
Teach Being Honest Through Stories
 
Search for stories that can teach them about the benefits of telling the truth, stories that teach the value of honesty. Just keep in mind that you do not have to be preachy or serious. Remember, today’s children need proof and you can give him some examples of present time too to make him understand and grasp your point.
 
Remember, when a child lies this does not mean that he is a pathological liar. Analyse the circumstances and situation and see whether he fears telling the truth. Set a good example and make an environment in your home so that the child does not fear telling any kind of truth.
 
Try to understand your child’s nature and intentions. If possible mould them in the right direction right from the time your child starts listening to you. The most important thing for you as a parent is to keep your head cool when you are listening to your child. Do not have a biased mind or let anger overpower your listening process.


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